“How’s your day going?”
I’ve heard Travis ask this question hundreds of times since before we were even dating. It wasn’t me he was asking (though he of course cares how I’m doing). This is a question he’s asked every cashier, every waiter, barista, receptionist (you name it!) he’s met. I quickly adopted the practice. I loved watching the “customer service” exterior melt away, and lock eyes with another human who finally felt seen in the middle of a day spent invisible.
Sometimes the meeting was brief with a genuine “thank you for asking” and sometimes the question became a safe space for a soul to become unburdened. We’ve met and prayed for a lot of people. Each one facing their own invisible battle. You’d never know unless you asked.
These days, it’s even harder to know the battles being fought. Our family is in the midst of one now. We have been since December 2019. And up until recently I didn’t realize how few people really knew. It just goes to show how hard it is to connect in this season. To know one another. And how easy it is to get caught up in keeping your head above water and forgetting to ask for a life raft.
If you didn’t know, I am the voice you hear giving the Riverbend announcements. They sound cheerful, upbeat, and easy. But beneath that “customer service” exterior are dozens of takes of me slurring my words, forgetting how to say something, stuttering… My invisible battle is a brain injury. One that is taking so much longer to recover from than we ever anticipated. Often times voicing over the announcements is all I am able to do in a day. So Travis’s invisible battle is caring for me, our son, and our home without knowing when he’ll get to rest, or when I will get better.
In my recovery, I’ve met a lot of people –– patients, receptionists, physical and occupational therapists — who I have gotten to talk to (verbal skills permitting). And I’ve learned some of their invisible battles too. As I become more able to type (speech is still a challenge at times), I have gotten to connect more with some of our Riverbend family. And we’ve been able to encourage one another and make some of our battles a little more visible, making one another feel a little more known.
All this to say, in a season dominated by isolation, I want you to know that you are not truly alone (so, reach out to someone!). Every single person I’ve met has a battle they’re fighting. I know you have one, too. Give yourself lots of grace. And extend that grace to others. If you see a cashier who is less than polite, stop and ask how their day is going. More times than not you’ll watch as they relax a bit more, you’ll connect with another human, and you’ll both leave feeling a little less alone.
Just one more way we can be “in it together.”